Teach your pets the importance of karaoke

Dogs and cats love to sing but they can't ever seem to remember the lyrics. That's why karaoke is perfect for them. Enjoy a cocktail, and watch the fun that ensues.

Make Cat Costumes... Then drug your kitty and make him hate you

Cats are people too! Sure they are.. They love dressing up in fun costumes... Right after you give them their "medication."

Have a Tiny Victorian Funeral For Your Gopher

That's right... I'll bet you've never even considered a get together to honor the life of your newly deceased gopher. Make it speak to the hearts of all your friends. Tell your gopher how much she will be missed, by holding an elaborate victorian funeral with a dazzling wake & shindig to follow. Money is no object since  the end of the world is right around the corner... (or should I say coroner?)

Beautiful "in mourning widow" martin skull with squirrel paws

Mourning muskrat - This is muskrat weird with
bird feet and hands. Nothing says muskrat love like this does

No miniature victorian funeral would be complete without a centerpiece to mourn over.
Dead gopher dressed in appropriate victorian garb for all your funeral needs

Make Chicken Shaped Cozy's for Everything!

You know you hate seeing that toaster, that blender, that food processor sitting on the counter... Learn to knit or crochet --- You will be dead but your place doesn't have to be unwelcoming.

Decorate Cakes Using an Airbrush

It's difficult. It's transitory. But with the world ending soon, transitory is relative.

Makeover Your House!

Take out a big-assed loan and do it up right. Make a damned statement.
Put in a reflecting pond out in front. Remember; it's not just a house... it's a big tomb.

Become a Biker

With 685 days left, here's a
damned good suggestion.
Join a motorcycle gang.
Since you already have 
the tattoos (Tatts in biker-speak) 
all you need to do is; buy
a Harley, dress biker style and understand terms like; tail gunner,
trailer twinkie, 22, 20-20,
mattress cover and war wagon.
Realize this is colorful language
and will ultimately enhance your vocabulary. Sure it's a big change
but time's a wastin'------
Grab your brain bucket
and burn some rubber.